We just watched the coolest movie with these cool new 1-D glasses!

Posted by Kyle Jacobson , Thursday, July 8, 2010 6:04 PM

It was a long night, the night before tonight. The clock had struck midnight before I was able to finish off my off-brand lucky charms. That may have been because I had taken much of the night fusing x-ray glasses with nutritional fact software that allows me to see the breakdown of ingredients just by looking at my food. I spent my time from 10pm to midnight trying to force myself to eat cereal. It's much less appetizing when the mallows stop looking like mallows and start looking like jet puffed blobs of high-fructose corn syrup injected with a pure sugar filling. I finally guzzled it down and quickly patented my invention before my roommates could pull a "James Cameron" on me and take my glory. My mind wandered for a while down into the rhetoric of His movie as I inserted myself beneath my "just imagine it's a down comforter" bedding. My eyes gracefully and politely rested themselves, tucking in my corneas and painting a sweet lullaby with rods and cones. Mmmmmm....Bliss....ERRR!!!! ERRRRR!!!! ERRRR!!! "HIT THE DECK!!! AHHHHH!!!" I screamed when my alarm clock punched me in the cochlea with it's sound waves. Is it 4:30 already? Time for work. The day passed. And then it passed again. Then again. Again. Then it finally ended. I left work racing a V-something engined bus to the stop with the helpful blue marker they call "a sign." I wave my pass, feeling important. Then seeing my co-riders and re-evaluating my existence. The next thing I remember is waking up with an odd taste of cracker jacks mixed with lemon meringue pie and an over-over-weight woman vocally wondering "where the HECK I am headed." This being the last stop on her route. A quarter-groggily I pulled on the string that I was resting my head on for the past hour and a half, stopping at every stop now made
sense. I got off and walked until I saw a familiar face. I never did find one. So I got on the next bus I saw and it seemed like it took me to somewhere and it was probably important. I got off on the corner of something and it was probably important and walked to the library. The same library that I am now forced to call my home due to the amnesia I have from whatever was stuck in my mouth during my crazy-neon-like dream while I was napping on the bus. Greetings from the Provo Library at Academy Square.

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